Tuesday, December 15, 2015

9 Cringe-Worthy Wedding Planning Moments (and How to Handle Them)

You’re planning the wedding of your dreams; there’s no stress, no up-tight moments, until, well until awkwardness strikes. I mean, how do you possibly tell someone that their child isn’t invited, or, that you’d rather take cash as your wedding gift? Like we said, awkward!

Although awkward moments are bound to occur, we have the answers to how to handle them. Want to know the secret? Keep reading for our 9 cringe-worthy wedding planning moments and how to handle them.

1. Bridesmaid: Who’s In and Who’s Out?

They’re your best friends from college; they got your through exams and bad breakups, but your wedding isn’t going to be big enough to have 27 bridesmaids. So, how do you tell your friends that you’re not including them in your wedding party? (You just cringed, didn’t you?)

Our Solution:

There’s no way you can avoid telling your friend she isn’t included in the wedding party, especially if she is looking for that invite, however, there are ways to still keep your friendship intact. After you’ve given the news, remind your friend how important your friendship is and that you are wanting to involve her in other parts of the wedding: the bachelorette party, reading a passage, guest book attendant, etc.

2. Kid-Free Wedding

Children are great; they bring excitement, youth, and joy. But some events are just for adults, and it’s completely alright to have a kid-free wedding! The only problem is how are you going to stress the point that it’s kid-free and still interest guests to attend? The awkward train just keeps rolling, doesn’t it?

Our Solution:

Don’t necessarily put “kids not welcome” on your invitation; simply word your invitation address differently. For example, instead of saying “The Brockenshire Family”, address it as “John and Jane Brockenshire.” Problem solved! This is a subtle way to let your guests know that kids aren’t particularly welcome. If a guest asks if they can bring their children, you can always apologize to them and then blame it on budget constraints. A white lie is acceptable in this circumstance (we won’t tell, promise!)

3. Wedding Party Payments

The subject of money, payments, cash, etc. is a touchy one. Maybe you covered a bridesmaid’s dress, or helped sponsor the bachelorette party, and now you’re looking for that IOU. It can be awkward to approach your friends asking for them to pay you back, but weddings are expensive!

Our Solution: 
Our friends at Venmo provide you with a great way to cover the costs for your bridesmaids that they can pay back later. With Venmo, you can bill your bridesmaids the bill for their dresses, hair, etc and they can accept the charges on their end. Awkward situation, sort of avoided, but it made it easier to deal with.

4. Asking for Cash as a Present

Since we are on the topic of money, why not keep on with all things awkward? The traditional approach to having a registry and asking for physical gifts is going by the wayside. Millennials (the generation getting married now) are already living together, which means they might not need some of the homegoods that are usually on a registry. Instead, couples are paying for their wedding and honeymoon themselves, making money the most obvious need. So how do you tell your guests exactly that you want money?

Our Solution:

Although you’re breaking tradition, asking for money isn’t a bad thing to do. You can set up a PayPal account and name it the “Honeymoon Fund” or “First House Fund.” These names encourage guests to give money because they know where it is going and how it will be used. And with the PayPal account, you can avoid the awkwardness of getting handed cash in front of everyone.

5. Disagreeing with the Wedding Planner, Mother of the Bride, Future In-Laws

Everyone is giving you advice, tips, etc. but you’re becoming overwhelmed and this wedding feels like it’s drifting further and further away from what you really wanted. You don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings, but something has to give.

Our Solution:

It’s your wedding! That is the key phrase to remember during the stressful parts of planning your wedding. Although you appreciate the help, advice, tips, etc. you don’t have to use or do everything someone suggests (especially if you’re paying for it). It might be difficult to tell people “no” but this is your wedding and it’s something you’ve dreamt about. Make it your own, and tell them you appreciate their idea but you were thinking about doing something else instead.

6. No Extra Guests

You work hard to create a guest list, making sure you didn’t exclude any family members, as well as fitting everything within your budget. Unfortunately though, you have to leave a couple people off the list. Eek! And then worst of all, some people are asking to bring along extra guests, like your fourth-cousin-once-removed wants his girlfriend and her sister to be invited.

Our Solution:

Honesty with a mixture of sympathy can go a long way. You can explain to your fourth-cousin-once-removed that you would love to get to know his girlfriend and her sister more but unfortunately you just can’t accommodate them at the wedding. You can always invite them to the after-party or out for drinks later on.  

7. Unexpected Guests

You send RSVPs for a reason: so you know exactly how many people are attending so you can budget for food and other accommodations. Although this could be one of the most frustrating parts of the wedding planning process, you can't let it overwhelm you.

Our Solution:

In case you're really worried that this might happen, the unexpected non-RSVP guest, you could always pay to have an extra table and food. Or, you could have your guest book attendant check people in and apologize if a guest’s name doesn’t appear on the list. It’s a tactful way of telling someone they weren’t expected and that there’s no room for them.

8. Too Tipsy

So you decided to have an open bar at your wedding, thinking it will make the crowd more comfortable and more apat to dance. But a couple of your guests took the open bar to mean “shots, shots, shots, shots, everybody!” You’re feeling embarrassed, your parents don’t look happy, and your grandparents want to leave. What do you do?

Our Solution:

Unfortunately, this situation is a tough one. You don’t want to worry your whole wedding day about watching after this tipsy group of people—it will significantly decrease the amount of fun you’re having. So if you have a bartender, make them aware that they are not to serve people anymore beverages if they feel they’ve had too many. Or, you can always have one of your bridal party members be on crowd control, making sure that if someone does get too tipsy, they find a safe way to get home.

9. Divorced Parents

Sadly, with the rate at about 50%, divorce is a real subject to discuss in your wedding planning. How do you seat your divorced parents at your wedding, especially if they don’t exactly get along?

Our Solution:

If your parents are on good terms, you can always sit them together! Problem solved. However, if you have parents who don’t get along particularly or are remarried, it’s perfectly fine to have one of your parents (and their new spouse) sit in the second row. And when it comes to the reception, be sure to give your parents separate tables where they can entertain their own respective families.

Awkward situations do happen during the planning process and even the wedding, but knowing how to handle situations before they arise will give you the confidence you need to not stress-out during one of the most special days of your life. And remember, if you need any more assistance, the Inspherio Crew is always glad to help. Our event planning business management solution can help you every step of the way when it comes to your event planning business. Check us out! We’ll even throw in a free-30 day trial.

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